Thursday, July 12, 2012

On Passive-Aggressive Knuckleheads, Or Grow Up, People!

I am kinda weird.

I know. Surprising, right?

Seriously, though.

I am a female gamer, which, in and of itself, puts me right up there with unicorns and the Easter Bunny on the  Plausibility Meter. I am a classical musician who listens to wacky musicians like Jonathan Coulton and Paul and Storm. I have ADHD, but I'm one of the most focused people in a rehearsal. In short, I defy much in the way of categorization. 

What seems to throw a lot of people, though, is that I am a woman, but I am direct and literal in my dealings with people. I don't beat around the bush. I don't do that whole passive-aggressive thing that seems to be so popular among those of the female persuasion. And if I have a beef with someone, they will probably know about it, probably sooner rather than later.

I have been told, on occasion, that this sometimes intense aspect of my personality is off-putting or intimidating. In living the example of how I would want to be treated, people seem to fear being direct with me. Even when I make it plain that hearing of someone's issue with me from someone else irritates me beyond all reason, people still refuse to come to me with their problems. In fact, they'll often talk to anyone BUT me about it.

The BEST part of this whole hot mess? These people will just stop talking to me altogether rather than deal with the problem. They would rather avoid confronting me (odds are, continuing to bitch about it behind my back to any willing audience) than come clean about everything and get it all out in the open.

Okay, seriously, guys. This has GOT to end.

I am not a mind reader. 
If I don't know it's broke, I can't fix it. 
If I don't know there's a problem, there's no way I can go about finding a solution.

And here's the part where, if you are one of these people, you really need to pay attention.

I am NOT going to eat you alive.
I have never gotten into the whole cannibalism thing, and I'm not likely to start with you.

Yes, we may argue.
Hell, we may fight.
But, at the end of the day, we will sort it out.
We'll probably be even better friends for it.

But you HAVE to talk to me about it. You HAVE to let me know.

Now, I can't speak for you, but I would much rather take a punch to the face than die from cancer. I would rather deal with things, air things out, and get all the cards on the table, than deal with the long, slow death of a friendship because someone else allowed some point of contention to poison our relationship.

Tl;dr: If you have beef with me, TALK to me about it. 
Talk to ME, not everyone else.
Grow up and handle your problems rather than feeding the Drama Llama.

1 comment:

  1. Haha. I like that Drama Llama :) I know exactly how you feel! I absolutely drives me to the brink of insanity that my family won't broach me with whatever issue they are having with me, but they spend plenty of time kibitzing behind my back, only for me to hear from someone else the problem they are having with me, and that they are upset with me. I just want to say, "Talk to me, already, and stop talking about me!"